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I Have Totally Had It!

Posted by Paul | May 13, 2014 at 12:09 PM ET

Today is not a great day for me. I feel I want to use the word melancholy to describe it, but that wouldn’t be completely accurate either. Usually when I am unsettled I write disjointedly. You will need to deal with that today because I will indeed be all over the place. I can’t seem to pinpoint the exact reason for my moodiness. I blared a live album of The B-52s on the way to work today and there has been no stress upon my arrival, so I should be up in spirit. I suppose something elsewhere, elusive has got me down. In general, passive-aggressiveness, utter/total disrespect for colleagues, and hatred is filling our community. It’s a wonder that we even like Star Wars at all. I am surprised we’re not moaning about the new Star Wars film being tentatively titled “Episode VII”. Or maybe some are. It has nothing to do with an imbalance of my serotonin levels. It has nothing to do with me being unhappy as a Star Wars fan and collector. But the universal negativity is enough to steal the joy away from a clown. (more...)

This article was originally intended to be co-written with someone I respect very, very much. But getting two strong-headed/strong-willed people to collaborate rarely works to success. While I would have loved to have a second opinion marbled throughout my thoughts, this may have become more of mess than it already is.

Am I an ungrateful spoiled brat? Perhaps. If you recall, I was part of the Boring Conversation Anyway podcast by flyguy.net and Dorksidetoys.com along with some of my best friends in the collecting site “industry” in an episode where we discussed whether collectors are truly collecting, or are they hoarding? Being part of the panel was difficult at best for me. I am not sure how forthright I came across on the video, but it’s been a topic which has been haunting me daily for months now. Many times I believe I have things in check, but then there are actions I view myself doing (from an outsider-looking-in point of view) that chill me to the bone. I am a true Star Wars lover and collector. But did I need that second TARGET exclusive for 75% off? Did I really need to army build Darth Plagueis, or even that “extra” 6” Stormtrooper for that matter? The healing oil that is felt from the thrill of a score at retail is dangerous, especially in drought season. It makes us happy. It gives us a rush. But those feelings are fleeting. Without getting too philosophical here, would that $10 have been better going into my savings account, or better yet, a church or charity? I have been pondering these dilemmas for months now. As discussed on the show, space is a major issue. Clutter is an even bigger issue. A three-bedroom house should not be filled with Star Wars toys. Yet, this is what surrounds me physically and the pain is felt to a degree emotionally.

When we posted the article linking this podcast, a JTA reader by the name of Ian Gebhard wrote a comment that pierced through my heart. He wrote “I actually have had a lot of time to think about this subject lately, especially as it applies to being able to enjoy it. Back at the end of January I began losing my vision, and being one who doesn't open I found that losing my sight caused me to spend more time looking at my collection, remembering different details such as where I got a figure or who I was with at the time. Now as I sit here recovering from surgery and slowly regaining my vision, I find that it's not so much the hunt or having the item, so much as the memories created. While I have been accused of hoarding, I find that with few exceptions I can let go of it as needed.” What powerful words these are. The reason why our passion exists for Star Wars is because of the wonderful memories we associate with it. That’s why The Vintage Collection had totally engaged us. It tugs on the heartstrings of our memories and brings us to a time when life was simpler and the pop culture was better. The further we get away from these times, fear gets generated that we’re going to lose them forever. But will we? And will modern collecting fill in the gaps of memory loss? Probably not.

I find that I want to be Ian in mind, spirit and soul. He is right. As I write each and every daily RDR here at JTA, I am able to remember the memories (old or new) of where I was when I found it. What experience did I have when I encountered the product in the store? Why does it jog my memory in this way? I feel perhaps we all need a little metaphorical blindness and during these dark moments we need to find what is truly important. We need to digest why we are collecting (or hoarding) and discover what in the end means the most to us. For me, I agree with Ian that it’s the memories that will last a lifetime. Plastic is certainly forever too, but with it comes a price: literally. Our bank accounts expend funds it shouldn’t be during a blinding recession, our homes become giant toy store upchucks, and the rush that we initially got when we bought the items is nowhere to be found when we’re pushing through to make space for the latest stuff. Aren’t the cherished memories the things we should be refreshing in our minds, and not panicking to load up on all of the temporary modern ones new toys give us? I don’t know if I am way off base or right on the money. I know I want the latest wave of 3.75” figures from Hasbro, but will they even reach the magnitude of what the vintage Kenner line brought me as far as happiness and incredible memories?

I am sure that there are many psychologists who could explain this all and quite well I imagine. But I think we all know what’s going on inside of us and don’t necessarily need it coming from an educated scholar when it’s all right here before us. I believe everything happens for a reason. I also make huge leaps. Maybe there is a reason that I am defeated/deflated/disappointed/aggravated about the Hasbro line. Maybe it’s part of the reason I snap at someone whose comment initially annoyed me. In other words, there are more things going on inside of me that need to be dealt with first. I have not and probably will not see the light about 5POA and dumbed-down vehicles, but maybe I have come to the realization that I am approaching the end of an era, maybe my own era? Is that possible? Have I grown weary from seeing collectors debate their validity and begin to attack each other to the point where I have drawn the line to say this just isn’t for me anymore? I have been living a cyclical life of highs and lows (strictly talking collecting here). New stuff always creates the rush. But the credit card swipe or the cash payout to secure these same items for the collection pale in comparison to their fresh announcements. Does this mean I truly can’t buy it all? (That’s rhetorical.)

Toy Fair and SDCC give me a wave of hope and excitement. But I find that I have a lot of discontentment during the year and I forget all of the incredible things Hasbro has given to us throughout the many years I have collected. Revisiting some of the older products in the RDRs have given me a fresh new outlook on how great I had it during the prime of collecting. Maybe it’s not about what Hasbro isn’t giving me now. Maybe it’s about revisiting what they have given me in the past. Why do I want to see Original Trilogy vehicles in 2014, when I have received almost all of them before 2014 in the past? I am not making black and white statements here so please don’t misunderstand me. Yes, new kids and collectors should have new opportunities to grab these things too and Hasbro should upgrade their past work. I would love to see a periodic re-release here and there, maybe with a unique feature or flare added to it. But I have collected during the premium golden era. I shouldn’t be obsessed with what Hasbro isn’t giving me now.

To all of you. Lift up one another, even if you disagree. Everyone knows how badly I have tortured my good friends who like Saga Legends and Mission Series figures. I can’t give them glowing reviews, but if you find merit in them , then more power to you with buying them. We have been given a great run from Hasbro (as well as other licenses). We have to remember the past and revisit it with the future. It has helped put things in perspective for me. I believe, if given the chance, it will do something similar for you.

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